The burden of bad bosses

Leadership is a complicated space. You can think about it in ten ways, or maybe you want to define the difference between leadership and management first. Either way, there are endless opinions, theories, and colourful diagrams about it.

Some people are natural leaders, some are naturally dominant, some are nowhere to be found, and some are far too worried about how others spend their days. Leadership can create, shape or dismantle your confidence, Many of us have been subjected to a bad boss, maybe even read a great article about spotting one (HBR), and we’re all too familiar with the toll it takes dealing with one.

Here are a couple of survival tips that we developed after surviving toxic bosses:

1. We are so sorry you’re in this space, and we believe that it is happening even if it's very subtle and inconsistent. Please remember you aren’t responsible for fixing anyone else’s awful behaviour.
   

2. Financially make a plan that gives you a chance to leave if you need to. We know that debt is a real issue that people don’t talk about enough, and we know that leaving your job without a plan b isn’t optimal.
   

3. Oh H to the yeS: If you can’t afford to leave, get ultra familiar with the occupational health and safety (OHS) laws where you live - especially psychological safety. You have the legal right to show up and do your work without experiencing abuse, insults and bias.
   

4. Policy: your organization likely has employee and employer conduct in place.

   1. Read it in detail

   2. Document the date, time, location, words spoken and how it made you feel. Keep this document somewhere you can access on your personal email, too, in case you’re let go and need to seek labour and employment guidance.
      

5. Let’s talk about the postcard technique - you’re going to need to lean on this.
   

6. Validate your fears - more often than not, we’re pretty accurate when we sense someone is mistreating us. Don’t dismiss these concerns, as that often compounds a loss of confidence in your thoughts and sense of self. Instead, begin the steps outlined above.

Bad bosses will come and go, your self-esteem can take a real nose dive when it happens. Job hunt, spend time with people you care about and remember that what you’re experiencing is sadly all too common, but it doesn’t have to be permanent.