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Writer's picturePermission Granted

Selling versus owning your skillset

What’s the right approach for you?



As your career builds momentum, you learn skills and experience that enhance your professional value. This can often lead to feeling you’re ready for a promotion and yet you may not be seen as prepared to take on senior responsibilities by your boss (or peers). The tendency might be to start trying to “sell” your value to those around you to secure and seal a better role. While it can be tempting to keep pushing how much you can offer at every opportunity, you may feel rejected or dismissed if you don't see immediate results. This can lead to:


  • Feelings of insecurity because you don’t know how this approach is being perceived

  • Burnout of trying so hard to make sure you’re seen, heard and recognized

  • Frustration because your approach may be fruitless or not acknowledged

  • Confusion because it seems to work for other people.


When we think of sales done poorly, we may feel uncomfortable or unsure and that can be the case when we self-advocate.


Self-advocacy:


To successfully self-advocate (sell or spotlight) your skills and value, consider the following questions:


  • Are you positioning to fill a need for the team and/or organization?

  • Are you able to tell a compelling story that leaves the listener with a sense of who you are and what you bring with a ‘we’ versus ‘me’ narrative?

  • Do you feel comfortable in yourself in this approach, do you feel glad you pushed your skills when you’re done your day?

  • Do you feel you were listened to or did you feel dismissed?

  • Has this approach got you any closer to where you wanted to go?


Reflecting on the above helps you determine if your approach is working or landing poorly with your peers and decision-makers. If the questions leave you feeling unsure, regretful and unclear, you may need a new direction.


Owning what you bring:


When you own your skillset, you are clear on your value and can operate from a place of calmness, confidence and certainty. Being clear, calm and centred can support being open to collaboration, opposing views, ideas and new approaches. Consider if the below steps help you feel empowered:


  • Grounding yourself before engaging with others (be it meditation, somatic rituals, breath work or practicing what you want to say, aka your “pitch”)

  • Sharing data points and facts that balance your narrative about yourself and how you contribute to a team’s success.

  • Taking credit for your original ideas and solutions while giving credit to those who helped support you and achieve the outcome.

  • Prep, prep, prep: you have thought through all the angles and perspectives around the situation (whether that using a SWOT, SOAR, PESTLE or another technique you found beneficial). This creates a balanced narrative and shows your critical thinking.


You know what’s right for you, assess how your approach is received by others and remember - the goal is to feel empowered and secure about what you offer. You got this!


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